39th Anniversary Sequel - The Rest of the Story!

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Hello there Sweet Friends,

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Wanted to say Thanks so much for all the nice

comments from yesterdays post.

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Hope you are all doing well today!

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I have just been doing a lil cleaning today,

and as I was cleaning I got to thinking

about yesterday post and how my purpose

was to pay a tribute to my hubby and

tell how we met,  and I think I accomplished

that purpose pretty well.

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But I felt the nudging of the Lord to tell the rest

of the story, and pay tribute to our Lord & Savior

Jesus Christ, because without Him and

His Marvelous Intervention in our lives,

I doubt very seriously we would have

made it passed the 10 year mark.

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Go back up and take a look at my

flowers,  notice they are arranged on

a white book.......that book is a Bible.

Keep that in mind as you read on.

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Jim and I moved to the Central Florida

area in May of 1980,  after Jim graduated

from College with his engineering degree.

For years he had worked full time and

gone to school part-time.

 That wasn't too bad until we had our son.

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  We were now on a very tight budget

 because I had  quit my job to stay home

with the baby, just as we had planned,

 so there was no extra money for going out

just the two of us,  and we had no relatives

in town to watch the baby,  a few times

 we left him with friends but I was nursing and

everytime he took formula from a bottle

he would throw it up and cry and cry,

so we tried several types of formula

and just gave up the idea of leaving him.

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I began to feel like a single parent,  and

of course,  most of my focus went to the

baby and the house.  Jim's focus was more

and more on his job and school,  and he

was so tired that when he came home he

just wanted to veg in front of the TV for

awhile because he then had studying to do.

I had been with a baby all day I wanted

some adult conversation, all the typical

stuff young parents go through.  We seemed

to be growing apart more and more.

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But when Jim graduated and we decided

to move to Central Florida I thought now

things will change cause he doesn't have

to study and go to school.  We moved

and were living in a rental and had contracted

to build a new house,  which was a total

dream for us,  we never imagined that

would be possible for us,  but at the time

building a new home was actually less

expensive than buying an older home.

So we were thrilled.

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 He had started his new job but it was about

 a 40 min.drive,  and it was long distance for me

to call him or vice versa.  I was use to him being

able to come home for lunch sometimes,  and

being able to talk with him at work if I needed

or wanted to,  I also knew what he did and

who he worked with since I had worked at

the same Company until I quit my job.

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All of these things made me feel very distant

from him, like I didn't have a part in his life,

and the patterns of the past with the TV

and the not talking or discussing anything

seemed to follow us.

My anger and resentment grew over his not

not wanting to talk about the problems.

 I began to say mean things to him,  and

I would see the hurt look on his face,

and would think what makes you do that.

I would sit by him,  and he wouldn't say it but

 his body language said "Get away from me"

I was very hurt by that, and felt helpless to

change anything.

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We had an arguement one evening

and I wound up sleeping on the sofa

for the 1st time in our whole married

life,  I just knew I could not go on

living like this!  I was convinced this

man did not love me at all!

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My own parents had divorced when

I was only 3 yrs. old,  and I had no

recollection of my dad ever living

with us. In fact, everyone in my family

 was divorced, some multiple times,

  so that was the last thing I wanted was a

 divorce,  but I also knew I couldn't continue

 living with someone I felt didn't love me.

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Jim on the other hand came from a family

where no one in his entire family was divorced,

accept one uncle,  I think it was.  Now that

did not mean that people were happily  married,

in fact,  a lot of them were miserably married.

That certainly in no way appealed to me!

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So the next morning,  after lying awake the

whole night on the sofa when I was suppose

to be sleeping,  I brought the crisis,  and

for the first time ever,  I used the D word.

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That got his attention,  finally!!

I could see on his face that what I had

been thinking about him not loving me

was just not true!  For the first time

ever in our marriage we finally really

talked about our relationship.  We

decided that we needed to go back

to church and get serious with the

Lord or we were not gonna make it.

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As we talked,  I remembered that a

girl at a model home had invited me to

a church in the community center

where we live,  so we decided we

were gonna go that Sunday,  and

we did,  and we have been going

to that same church for 29 yrs. now.

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When Jim and I got married we were

both Christians,  but very ignorant as

a stone Christians,  we knew nothing

about the word of God really!

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So we began attending this Christian

Missionary Alliance Church and

God started putting people in our

path,  books in our hand,  gave us

Christian friends to encourage us and

taught us by going to Sunday School

 classes on marriage,  parenting and

finances and just teaching on the word

of God. We had a wonderful Pastor

who was a great bible teacher and

counselor.  Although we probably

needed marriage counseling we never

did get any because the Lord just

began to change our selfish hearts

and make us one.

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 We began to understand God's

word and that we needed to practice

and do what God's word teaches,

and little by little as we began to do

that, God began to make our marraige

better and better,  and has continued

to this day.  Now we teach most of

the marriage classes at our church,

and I believe we needed to experience

what we did, so we would know how

other people feel and what they are

going through.  We have a real heart

for marriages and want to see people

not just be married, but happily

married.  I don't think it was God's

intention for us to be miserable.

If God can get 2 willing hearts,

he can change things very quickly,

but even if one person is obedient

to God's word,  God can work

in amazing ways.

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After we started growing as Christians

that is when I started learning about

the Holy Spirit and realized that

when I met Jimmy and thought there

was something very different about

him,  it was my spirit bearing witness

with his spirit.  We had not had that teaching
  from Gods word about not being unequally
yoked,  so we never really discussed
if we were christians or not.
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Also,  I chose to carry a bible at my

 wedding because I had Christian neighbors
that  were a huge influence in my life,  and  they are the
number one reason I am a Christian today
and they were very happily married,  and I knew they

were happy because of God and that was what I

 wanted for my marriage.  I would say God

 honored the heart desires of that 18 yr. old girl!

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Just thought I should share this because just like

 the "thrifty Decor Chick" said in one of her posts

 last week,  sometimes you read peoples blogs and think

they have a perfect life! But there is no one who

 doesn't experience some type of problems or conflict

 in their marriage or family. Some worse than others,  True,

but no person is perfect,  therefore, no relationship is perfect,

 but if you work together it can be very very Good, 

and that is where we are now,  I am happy to say,  but we

give all the Glory to the Lord. He is Awesome!

 and we could

have never done it alone.

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Hope that somehow this has encouraged your

heart and made you glad you know God and

the power of  His resurrection, or makes you

want to know Him,  if you don't!

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Thanks for coming by,

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Love,  hugs, and Blessings,

Nellie